Bermuda, Bahama

“Come on, Pretty Mama.”

So I’m watching Portlandia today and it made me want to go to Portland.  I saw Boyhood this weekend and it made me want to visit Texas.  SNL made me want to go to New York. And everything makes me want to go to Paris!!

All this made me realize where I want to live.  And the answer is–Not here!!  Not anywhere really.  I want to travel around.  I envy the ones who succeed at their art and go on tour.

I don’t envy those that travel for their job.  That seems lonely.  Traveling for your art is less lonely.  For one, there is usually some kind of posse.  So it’s kind of like a traveling family even if the posse is little.  Another thing is that you are traveling for your passion.  And that is awesome.

I have traveled for my art.  I’ve gone to Nevada, Massachusetts, Indiana, Pennsylvania, New Jersey, Colorado, Virgina, New York and Ontario as well as Ohio where I live.  I never went on tour though.  I had a tour with a band scheduled once but it fell through.

Dancing to live music is incredible.  It’s two passions put together on stage which makes it electrifying!!  Going on a tour of electrifying performances night after night, state after state, province after province is the dream.

Dear Band that would like a live fusion dancer to hit the road with them– I am ready!!

Until then, I have Portlandia and my dreams.

What a Noble, Distinguished Collection

“Of fine little friends you have made.”

(Amanda Palmer The Point of It All lyrics that seem to have that sarcastic tone I like.)

I finished reading Ms. Palmer’s book The Art of Asking today.  I recommend it to any and all artists.  First off–it will make you realize that you are, in fact, an artist.  Then you will realize that ALL artists question whether or not they are, in fact, an artist.  Then when you are more than halfway through the book, an awesome and bold story about her relationship with her mother will make you realize that we are ALL artists.

We are all artists that have a need to have our art noticed and respected.  I respect Amanda’s many arts as well and her mother’s very different art.  And after reading this, I have a much greater respect for my own art that I work very hard doing.  That my dancers come to my studio week after week and work very hard doing.  We are all artists doing our thing.

And when we do our thing, we get a great deal of respect.  The compliments from audience members, the people that recognize me at the market and Starbucks, the emails from people who saw the show and wanted to reach out and tell me they liked it.  The others who find me to say “are you the ones that did that piece that had a ghost dancing in the middle??  That was my favorite piece ever.”  There are many connections that fulfill our need for respect of our art.

My main problem is noticing them like I should.  Now I’m sitting writing this blog thinking about all the things that have happened over the years.  What admirers have done and said to show their love of us and what we do.  Why didn’t I realize before today how many there were?

I had my first student stalker when I taught a workshop in Indiana a few years back.  After my class –in another location, I noticed a girl staring at me.  I thought I had my skirt tucked in with my ass hanging out until she came up to me and told me she took my class and loved it.  She stared at me the rest of the day, evening and during the gala show.  I was not creeped out.  I’ve been her when I saw a dancer that inspired me.  I was thrilled to fill that spot for her.  I may have been a little more subtle than she was but we all have our ways.

We’ve had a handful of male stalker fans too.  Not “call the police” male stalkers but men that show up for every show and stare at the dancer they like.  Many of us have been the one the stalker liked.  When I was the one, I didn’t like it.  It brought back memories of when I was stalked by a real-life “call the police” stalker which caused me to create fears in my head when my eager fan showed up.  He wasn’t dangerous though. He was just my fan.

Here is a list of under-appreciated love:  kids who want to play with our props, men who yell things at us like we are strippers, and women who come up and say, “it’s so nice to see performers that have real bodies.”  Yeah, you were trying to compliment us but all we heard is “you’re fat!!”  Truth!!

But I get it now.  You all like us.  And I’m going to work very hard to notice that from here.

Artists (which of course means everyone) I urge you to read.  You will feel better about your art when you do!!

That Thing You Do

“Every day just doing that thing.”

Today I caught the end of the movie That Thing You Do. I haven’t seen it in forever. I saw it the year it came out in the 90s. Before I was ever a bellydancer. Before I was Jez. Before I ever thought about becoming Jez.

It’s a completely different movie when you watch it after you’ve experienced the performer life. Even though it’s a different art and a different level of popularity, it captures exactly what you go through from trying to succeed at your art, to succeeding at your art, to what happens to your ego after you succeed at your art. These three phases are so difficult In some ways and so easy in others. One thing is for sure though, it is awesome!!

One scene definitely caught my attention: half way through their tour they added background dancers to their act. They stood on tables behind the band doing choreographed dances to the song. I’d love that job!!

You Can Ring My Bell

“Ring my bell”

I get the bell jar comparison now.  I didn’t when I read The Bell Jar over a decade ago.  But I had gotten to the point where I was in the bell jar and I felt it lifted off me today, tonight really.  It was when I exercised with weights for 29 short minutes.  That’s all it took.  The ironic thing is that I was using the bell jar as a reason not to exercise.  It really is a physical cause.  A mental problem with a physical solution.  I advise never to slough off the simple suggestion.  It’s often the one that really works.  It’s often better than meds anytime for anything.  Shock worked for Sylvia; simple weights worked for me.  I am blessed.

And because of this post, I am expanding my blog theme beyond gigs and classes.  It’s all part of the big picture of my life as a bellydancer anyway.

Like a Record, Baby

“Right round, round round.”

Tomorrow is NYE and every year I have different resolutions.  I usually keep most of them too.  Not all.  I fall off the wagon sometimes but I do well.  I thought I would post them here so if I do fall off the wagon, I have it publicly posted for shame reasons.  So my whole two readers, you have my permission to shame me.  🙂

Jezolutions for 2015 (I just created that word right now!!):

1.  I want to travel more for dance.  I would love to do some more shows outside the tri-state area!!

2.  I want a handful of solos in different styles.  There is no reason I shouldn’t have this already since I don’t need to depend on ANYONE to make this happen.

3.  I want flat abs!!  I have never in my dance career had flat abs.  I want to see what it’s like.  I bet it’s cool!! I’m going to do some serious ab work daily and see where it takes me.  🙂

And that’s my list.  What is yours??  Post it in comments and let’s do it together!!

He’s in the Army Now, A-blowing Reveille

“He’s the Boogy Woogy Bugle Boy of Company B.”

There’s a point.  I bet you can guess.  Just kidding.  No one would guess this.

I entered the Blackwater Cabaret’s Miss USO pageant and WON!!  I am the reigning Blackwater Miss USO complete with sash and crown and commitments to make appearances throughout this year until I pass down the crown to the next Miss USO next year.  How fun!!

I love it since I’m kind of obsessed with the 40s and gypsy jazz etc.  And my polka dot dress has more opportunities now.  :). Always a bonus.

My first appearance as the reigning Miss USO is next weekend.  Let’s do it!!

Hello

“Is it me you’re looking for??”

I know I keep saying this but this time it’s true. I’m going to blog more than once a year. Even if it’s just a gig haiku. That sounds fun. Let me try that:

Last gig of the year
Oddmall was our final show
‘Til email today

Yes we got an email asking us to dance this weekend. I will probably say yes because I always do.

I have different goals for next year. I don’t even want to write them down yet because I don’t want to set myself up but they are really bold!!

I also have a Qaina announcement that will surprise people a little bit. I will have that by the end of this week. Stay tuned!!

Oh By Golly

“Have a Holly Jolly Christmas this year.”

I just needed an excuse to use the word golly.

As the end of the year approaches, I realize I basically took a year off from blogging.  I did my 365 days of practice and then I unconsciously said to myself, “No need to blog.  Ignore it for a year.”

We are two weeks from 2013 so I need to quit that.  I don’t want to blog about practice though.  That’s been done.  By me.  You all get it.  I practice.  🙂  I want to blog about more exciting bellydance stuff and my sarcastic views on said stuff.  I put at the top of my blog that every gig has a story.  I guess I should probably share those.

Like this year:  We had a car pull up onto our stage area.  Yes, a car.  Why didn’t I think to park next to the stage.  I parked in a parking spot and walked like I was a commoner.

I choreographed a routine to honor a dead man.  It was touching and a good routine that lots of people learned and performed at the memorial.

I learned how important tiny snippets of music between songs are at gigs.  I love telling the sound person to just start the music and let it play. 

I relearned that sound people cannot be relied on.  (Shout out to Dark Lady!!)  Take it from me, and take it from them–bring a back-up speaker if you want to be assured that you will perform.

I performed at a place called the White Rabbit Cabaret.  (Shout out to Melly!!!)  It will go down as a favorite.  We had our pictures taken in one of those old photo booths that give you a strip of four in black and white.  I need more cabarets in my life.

I performed at a Guitar Shop/Bar in Massachusetts.  It was the absolute coolest place.  There were guitars and banjos on the all the walls including behind us on stage.  We are going there again!!  (Bobbie Shout out!!)

I performed to musicians that I met five minutes before the show started and didn’t suck!!  (Another shout out to Melly.  JezeMel!!!)

I performed a SOLO at the Holocaust Museum.  I will forever remember all the survivors that remembered who I was from my first performance a year before!!!  They knew who I was!!!  (Shout out to Brett!!)  I have gained so much from you!!

I whipped a dancer that dressed like a tiger just so I could whip her!!  (Shout out to Sophie!!)

I saw a dance troupe grow so much so fast that I am giddy about what is in store for them.  (Shout out to Maevyn!!)

I also had some things happen that I will hold the shout outs for:  I saw dancers lose dance skill in favor of being difficult, I saw a dancer lose opportunities because of ego, I saw laziness beat out integrity in a priority war, I saw a personality change before my eyes,  I had to kick people out of routines for not knowing them (so hard for me), I had to deal with the whole there is no sitter so my children came with me to the gig issue, and the bellydance opportunity I was eagerly planning for and looking the most forward to was pulled out from under me.

Sounds like a typical year of an artist, doesn’t it??  Good or bad, they all have a story.  It is an adventurous life I have chosen.  I can’t wait to see what the next year holds!!!

(I wrote this in December and forgot to put it up.)

Get Up Get up

“Get busy do it!!”

So as I wrote in my last post, I want to work on my solo skills.  Any time I have said that in th past, I haven’t had much follow through.  I always work on one thing and then back into the group stuff for one of my many troupes

I have a good report though. I  got back from practice tonight and then went onto the Internet.  I spent so much time on there that it was 11:45 PM when I got off and I still hadn’t  worked on my solo stuff.  Thoughts went through my head like they do every day.  I am tired from practice.  I can start tomorrow.  I already practiced with a troupe.  I did plenty.  These are the same things I have said to myself for years.  All of these phrases are things that go against what I tell others.  Just do it.  Can I put that excuse in the show program??  Suck it up –also a favorite.

So you know what comes next.  With my lazy pajama wearing ass in the recliner, I felt guilty enough to get up, put on appropriate practice attire (at least appropriate enough to wear in my  own home) and I started working on my solo stuff. I took an advanced online dance class.

I love what I learned.  I love that I got up and did it when the easier thing was to stay in my comfy chair and my jammies.  And let me give you one piece of unasked for wisdom–you will never be sorry that you didn’t choose laziness!!

If You Don’t Like What You See Here

“Nobody wants to take you prisoner.”

So this has been the busiest year in my history of bellydancing.  I love it!!  And I am tired.  And I injured myself.  But I love it.  The only thing I would change is that I want more.  I will never complain about being busy because this is what I want.

This is actually my first weekend off in months and I feel lazy.  I really would rather just be dancing all the time.  And traveling.  I love to travel outside of Ohio where everyone knows me and perform and/or teach in other states where no one knows me.  I love when those who have never seen me and don’t know me personally see what I do and love me based solely on my workshops and performance.  It makes me feel like I am doing something right.

I do wonder what exactly has made me so busy.  Is it my work??  Is it my personality??  Is it a mix of many things??  Just wondering so I can keep doing it!!  I welcome any suggestions on what I am doing right.  Keep the what you don’t like about me to yourselves because I cry a lot.  😉

I have also come to another decision.  I am going to really work on solo skills this year.  I have worked so hard for so long on group choreographies and what makes a group look good.  I like my group stuff so much more than my solo stuff.  Of course, I do.  That is where a majority of my time is spent.  I am going to spend equal time on my solo stuff for the next year and build that up because I have clearly realized one thing this year–you can’t depend on anyone.  You can’t breathe easy with anyone.  If I say, “she’s always reliable.”  That is the year she becomes unreliable.  If I say “she is always nice to me.”  That is the time she starts being difficult and telling people my secrets.  If I say, “she’s got my back.”  That’s the time she starts insulting me to others and taking credit for my work.  I have lived it over and over!!  I hope to never live it again but if I do–solo skills!!  That is my new plan!!